WARSAW — I really believe everything which happens in life can be a learning lesson — whether good or bad. I have heard some people say, “The best way to learn a lesson is the hard way.” What they are saying is they believe they need to experience something bad to really learn the lesson well. I absolutely do not ascribe to this belief.

When we are around little children we are constantly telling them to not put their hand here or their mouth there. However, if we really believed something bad has to happen to in order to learn the lesson we should not tell our children to keep their hands away from the flame on the stove. We should let them touch it and get burned. After all, the best way to learn a lesson is hard way, right? Do you see how stupid it is to think this way? Of course we don’t let them touch the hot stove.

(By the way, I am writing the word stupid knowing if my children see it, they will correct me. We do not allow them to ever use the word. I am breaking my own rule, so you know I am using it to make a major point.)

We tell our kiddos not to put their hand in the fire because we care about them and we probably experienced the fire to some degree ourselves. We hope we can teach them a lesson without them learning it the hard way. I agree we can learn from both good and bad things which occur in our life, but it does not have to be bad, hurtful, or “the hard way.”

I prefer to learn by the experiences of others. I hope I can learn from the mistakes and the successes of others — not just their mistakes. I further hope others can learn from my mistakes as well as successes I may have in my life. It is just hard for some people to change their thinking when it comes to learning a lesson.

There is a scripture, Romans 8:28, which says, “All things work together for good…” It does not say all things which happen are good. It only says all things will work together for good. Good and bad things will happen all the days of our lives. We need to get rid of the thinking that “someone up there is trying to teach me a lesson” when something bad happens. The universe, or God, is not bringing bad things your way just to make you learn some lesson.

If we are honest with ourselves, many times when bad things occur, we usually had a part in making them happen. Again, we can learn lessons from both good and bad experiences in our life, but we should not think the best way to learn a lesson has to be from a negative experience.

What is the best way to learn some great lessons of life? Here are the three best ways: read, listen and watch. Read about the lives of others who have experienced both failure and success. Listen to others as they share their wisdom from both positive and negative experiences. Watch what happens to those around you as they experience the ups and downs of life. As you read, listen and watch, see what has worked and what hasn’t worked in their lives.

What lesson can you learn from what you are experiencing right now? Make sure it leads to a positive outcome and it makes you a better friend, spouse, parent, employer or employee.